Saturday, June 12, 2004

Ain't no mountain high...

At Church yesterday I was contemplating on prayer. My conscience told me I had not thanked the omnipotent one for all the great things he had done for me recently. So I decided to....

Dear Lord,

Lord let me thank you for your divine intervention in so many things. It is your generosity that makes all these wonderful people come to church. Especially that cute little thing there.

Lord thank you for making the world. And all the wonderful countries. Especially Lebanon. And for making all animals. Expecially chickens. Lord I thank you so much for plants and vegetables. Especially the chickpea. And of course thanks for teaching the Lebanese to grill the chicken and make chickpea dip. And for giving life to the guy who brewed malt, barley and hops for the first time, had a swig and thought "Thith HIC! stuff ith HIC! prethee gooth..."

Lord thank you for happy hours, bottomless mugs and snacks on the house. I see no reason why those things should exist. Only divine intervention could let it happen. However instead of just mentioning it, you could have passed on that "water into wine" trick though.

Lord thanks for keeping all my best friends single. Not that I would be jealous if many of them were paired up. No. Its the unholy thoughts I am worried of. Lord you keep my mind pure. I thank you for that. Lord I also think one of my friends maybe on the threshold of a relationship. Please maintain my pure thoughts by putting an end to that.

Lord thank you for arranged marriages where parents refuse to listen to their children. Personally I really dont see the other person agreeing of their own accord. Lord thanks for possible in-laws who want an MBA son-in-law for their cute daughter. And see the excess weight only as the indication of an affluent family and a well-fed childhood.

Lord I thank you so much for giving mankind add-on credit cards. And for making credit statements appear only in abbreviated form. So that Dad sees "Balaji Retail" when he could so easily be reading "Balaji Wine Shop and Bar". I also thank you Lord for Pramod Chamarthy. He never touched a drop through four years of college. Thank you for making him good at changing other people's clothes, making him strong enough to drag us home and giving hom strong deo.

Lord thank you for my summer internship. And thanks for making it in Bombay. But most of all thanks for giving me accomodation in Wilson College. You could have so easily put me in a/c company acco or star hotels. But you knew that not every man can escape being a POW and you made sure I was ready.

Lord I am so grateful for drawstring pants and trousers with elastic. Now I can sit down without turing blue or making myself impotent. Lord also thank you for making mallus, giving them cloth and no buttons, zippers or pins. You forced them to make the lungi. Lord thank you for the ventilation and freedom of movement.

Lord thank you for helping me clear CAT. You kept me awake endless nights. Made me work without rest. Till I found success. Lord also thank you so much more for having revealed the CAT leak scam only this year.

And finally Lord thanks for the single source of joy and bliss I can always depend on. In the hottest of summers and the coldest of winters it is always with me, on me. Lord thank you for Itchguard.

I sleep now with a clear conscience.

10 comments:

ab said...

Lord, Thank you for giving me Sidin Vadukut as my pyare senior.The Best 2. On the House :D

[BOWS in AWE]

Anonymous said...

..lord, thank you for having revealed the CAT scam this year!..got an awful lot of rest and sleep and home food ever since!! and all this without having to work a muscle!!! you always knew whats best for me!

moodithaya

Anonymous said...

keep it coming. you have just saved an otherwise depressing day.
sunshine. pure sunshine dearo.

Jupe said...

(looking up towards heaven) n hey u big man up dere.. danks for givin' us this Sidin.. V vere all cryin' "After Wordsworth, whu whu whu" - Now i see ur SIGN - "Sidin, tis yoo yoo yoo"

Anonymous said...

sidin,

what denomination are you? are there any more cuties in your church? ;) good one...

jjm

Giri said...

I got hooked on to ur blog ever since i got the "Travails.." forward. Extremely good stuff. Have read all your posts till date. In fact read a few of them like the armstrong one, kujumbinana, travails, many times over that i almost know them by heart !! We friends were even discussing about you (and your blogs) the other day - .. hey sidin got a new cute-lil mp3 player...one of the comments for the xyz article was good... - much like the way college girls, housewives seem to discuss about what a bespectacled clumsy looking supposedly intelligent girl is up to in "jassi jaisi koi nahin" or some such serial. Well, you are becoming FAMOUS day by day :-)

One question : Has it not become an addiction for you to keep blogging? Question is more from when you are visiting places, watching movies, etc. does your mind not involuntarily start thinking putting this in the blog, framing sentences, wording them to make the blog interesting etc.. ?? You can ofcourse quip saying that you are gifted enough not to be so obsessive about blogging.I sincerely hope so.

Keep supplying those constant feeds of nourishment. May the force be with you !!

P.S. Me too RECTian. Your junior batch though.

Anonymous said...

sidin i heard two chicks talking about your blog yesterday...

Paddy said...

Lord,Thank you for the divine conspiracy that led me to read the forwarded message of "The travails".. The thread which forces me to read this blog and he also asked me to spread the word to you.

3 Commandments (The next 7 are in the mail..)
------------------------------------------------
1.Thou shalt read Sidin frequently and study his enunciations with care, for verily his perception and judgement oft exceed thine.

2.Thou shalt not read the comments on sidin's blog, for chaos and madness await thee at its end.

3.Thou shalt discuss his stories with your friends even when thou art convinced that this is unnecessary

----------------------

Anonymous said...

sidin if u keep writing like this i mite fall in love with u.................................................................................................................................... r blog

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